... color therapy (chromotherapy) and color psychology in the philippines ... (life coach, counselor, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist)

matang lawin ("hawk eye") is a science-environmental tv show aired on abs-cbn and hosted by kim atienza. today, they interviewed me about color therapy. 

color therapy, also known as chromotherapy is one of the modalities i use as an art therapist and holistic healer. color therapy is usually applied through 

(*) visualization/mental imagery exercises,  (*) exposure to lights of different colors, and

(*) the use of colored lenses on eyeglasses.

 as a certain color enters the eyes, it affects the hypothalamus, pineal gland, and pituitary gland, all of which govern and regulate hormonal production, which in turn creates cellular changes.

red for instance has been found to increase melatonin production at night by 70% and can also help people with autism. blue has the potential to help people with dyslexia (learning disorders) and dyskinesia (movement disorders). 

as for the psychology of color, you can visit the very first post on my blog: 

http://randydellosa.blogspot.com/2009/04/hmm-i-wonder-what-color-your-mood-is.html 

life is good and so i wish to leave you this quote by danny kaye: 

life is a great big canvas... and you should throw ALL thepaint you can on it! 

... reiki mawashi and dragon ball z energy blasts in the philippines ... (life coach, counselor, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist)

"reiki" means "universal energy." "mawashi" means "round, revolve, current, or game." 

"reiki mawashi" is a reiki practice of gathering in a circle, joining hands, and then sending energy to flow within the circle. it is usually done as a formal exercise for generating collective healing energy for the participants.

for today's group however, we did "reiki mawashi" as a fun game for developing a sensitive feel for energetic flow.

sometimes, "reiki mawashi" can generate a lot of energy which makes the group participants sway rhythmically from side to side.

not knowing what to do with the excess energy built up, we simply decided to blast our photographer with dragon ball z (dbz) energy balls.

hi doctors sam padre, alex pacheco, ronald miranda, and pocholo morales! it was nice exchanging good energy with you! :D

... anti-bullying campaign philippines ... (life coach, counseling, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist)

Bullying

. Why do school kids and teenagers bully?

There are many reasons why school kids and teenagers bully. Some bully in an attempt to hide or mask their feelings of inferiority. To compensate for their low self-esteem, they act arrogantly and try to dominate and demean those who they perceive are weaker than them. Others bully because they themselves have been victims of bullying by classmates or maltreatment by their parents. Bullies also need to be evaluated as to whether they have a narcissistic or sociopathic personality disorder.

. When should the bullied child report this to the school principal?

It is important for victims of bullying to seek protection and support from adults. These adults include the principal, teachers, guidance counsellors, security guards, school personnel, parents of other classmates, even including the maintenance staff. All adults in school have to be vigilant and play an active role in preventing bullying from occurring inside the campus.

. Should a child fight back or go to the principal's office to report the incident?

Children should not be advised to fight back because they can get harmed in the process. Bullies usually have friends who also have a hostile predisposition, so they may gang up on the victim and maul him. There is also a risk that the bully may be carrying some weapon which could inflict serious or even lethal injury on the victim.

. Are there children more prone to bullying than others? Why or why not?

Bullies usually pick on those kids who they perceive are weaker than them. Kids at risk are those who are smaller, more quiet, passive, submissive, and fearful. Apparently, kids with these characteristics are most likely not going to retaliate against their aggressor.

. What should the parent of the bully or the bullied child do?

Parents of the bullied child should first of all talk, empathize with, and console their child. Out of fear, they may keep mum about the bullying which they experience. The bullied child will need encouragement to be more at ease in sharing his ordeal. Parents should discuss the matter with the teachers, guidance counsellor, and principal and come up with strategies and solutions. If the child is traumatized and suffering from anxiety, depression, or other symptoms, consultations with a psychologist or psychiatrist may be helpful.

Parents of bullies need to assess whether their child’s bullying behaviours stem from family problems, marital problems, or an unhealthy parent-child relationship. If these exist, then a counsellor or psychologist should be consulted. With the psychologist’s help, a behavioural modification program consisting of rewards and penalties should be designed and implemented.

... GREAT (Growth and Recovery Enhancement for Anxious Thinkers): support group in the philippines for people with social anxiety/ phobia ...

GREAT: Growth and Recovery Enhancement for Anxious Thinkers

A group of brave souls who go out of their comfort zones in support of one another to break free from social anxiety and depression in the quest for a joyful and meaningful life. 

Our Vision: A joyful and meaningful life 

Our Mission: To support one another in order grow, evolve, and be empowered to break free from social anxiety and depression 
Our GREAT Goals: 

G - ood social interaction 
R - ecovery from depression 
E - nhancement of life’s growth 
A - nxiety-free positive thoughts 
T - ime-tested support for one another 


Membership in this group is free but an essential requirement is that the member should willingly attend and actively participate in the group therapy sessions facilitated by a competent psychotherapist/life coach. 



The group schedules therapy sessions at most twice a month, and each member attending gives donation for maintenance costs to our facilitator, the amount depending on the number of attendees and his capacity to contribute financially. 

Activities for each session vary but mainly the group applies Gestalt therapy which is about the "here and now" experiential learning. Gestalt therapy emphasizes the importance of personal growth by working on one's unfinished business, and by being responsible for one's thoughts, feelings, choices, and actions. One's thoughts will be validated with what the group is actually thinking. The members are also challenged to do or experience the thing they fear. The group may also have healing sessions at times, like the facilitator may administer psychiatric acupuncture and may be teaching the group emotional freedom techniques (EFT) and how to perform reiki healing. 

In between sessions, the group members continue to connect and support each other through the GREAT group page. 

Website: 

http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f161/quezon-city-growth-and-recovery-enhancement-for-anxious-thinkers-great-137266/t.com/forum/f161/quezon-city-growth-and-recovery-enhancement-for-anxious-thinkers-great-137266/ 

E-mail address: 

great711@groups.facebook.com 
chevlenz@yahoo.com. 

... growth group activity: chopping up a snake and reviving a skeleton back to life ... (life coach, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist)

medical students from u.p. manila dropped by for a growth group activity experience. shown here with me are ralph mendoza, april lapuz, jean mendoza, and bryan mesina. 
 

the activity entitled "chopping up a snake" revealed how intimate relationships can surface our insecurities and fears, make us feel vulnerable, and result in trust issues.

the activity entitled "reviving a skeleton back to life"revealed how past situations still get resurrected when they should really be buried for good.

i hope that ralph, april, jean, and bryan gained insights that can guide them well in their journey through life.

... adjusting to new school ... (life coach, counselor, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, philippines)

Adjusting to new school

What are the sources of stress for the child and the parent when the kid transfers to a new school?

Human beings are creatures of comfort. So when transitions and changes come along, it is only natural to get stressed. This applies to children as well as adults.

When children transfer to a new school, there is always a fear of the unknown. Since a new school is unfamiliar territory, the child wonders whether the teachers are strict, whether the subjects are difficult, and whether he can blend in with new classmates.

Another stress new transferees have is in getting separated from friends and classmates from the previous school. There may be some sort of separation anxiety, loneliness, and a sense of alienation in the first days of being in a new school.

Also, if the reason for the transfer is a conduct problem from the previous school, the child wonders whether people in the new school will ever find out.

As for the parents, their anxieties primarily center around whether their child will adjust smoothly and integrate well in the new school- its system, its teachers, and the new classmates their child will have.

What should the parent do? Should he stay in school for the first few days to help the child adjust? If so, for how long?  What should the parent tell the child and his teacher?

Months before it actually happens, the parents must prepare the child for the transfer. Parents can open up the topic with the child and discuss the reasons why the transfer must be done. The parents can also give the child options for which school he could transfer, thus empowering the child to make his or her choice. Visits can be done to prospective schools so that the child gets a feel of its environment. Lastly, a generous dose of encouragement and emotional support should be given to the child before, during, and after the transition takes place.

If needed, and if school policies allow, parents of young anxious children can accompany them for a few days just so that the child does not feel alone, lonely, or lost.Slowly, the parent weans away as the child develops friendships among his or her classmates.

Both parents and teachers can strategize on how to get the child integrated in the new school. For instance, other children can be assigned to befriend and accompany their new classmate. Also, the child can asked to join enjoyable activities which build confidence and promote friendships.

Around how long will it take a child to adjust to his new school?

Every child is different in the way he or she adjusts to transitions. Some will have no difficulties in adjusting, while others will take months to feel comfortable in the new environment. To be on the safe side, it is best to monitor the child for symptoms of anxiety and depression. This may manifest as changes in motivation, mood, behaviour, and health.

... abs-cbn interview on the top 3 relationship problems of couples ... (life coach, psychotherapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, philippines)

Just by virtue of being imperfect humans, people are going to experience conflict in their relationships.

Of course, in the beginning of a relationship, partners are usually madly in love with each other. In this phase called “infatuation,” love is indeed blind and partners are oblivious to each other’s flaws and faults. However, as the passion of the relationship fades, reality sets in and that’s when the differences become more apparent.

As a counselor and psychologist, clients consult me for all sorts of relationship problems. The most common of these problems would be constant quarrelling, lack of intimacy, and infidelity. These 3 problems are undoubtedly interrelated but can also exist independently. Let’s discuss each of these problems in greater detail.

Constant quarrelling between partners is a combination of many factors: unrealistic expectations and demands, impatience, lack of cooperation, and poor conflict resolution skills. Obviously, partners with high or unrealistic expectations are just setting themselves up for disappointment and frustration. Those who are demanding simply get impatient waiting for their partners to comply. No amount of nagging, cajoling, and arguing is going to work on a person who doesn’t want to cooperate or to change.

One rule of thumb is this: If you’ve told your partner 3 times to do something, and it still hasn’t been done, then it’s most likely against his or her will to do it. It would be wise for the demanding partner to lower or modify his or her expectations rather than to force the issue.

Constant quarrelling is also aggravated by poor conflict resolution skills. Partners have to learn how to fight fairly. That means, keeping heads cool and avoiding emotional outbursts. It’s always good to solve problems rationally, pro-actively, and strategically because emotions simply cloud the problem-solving process. Thus, if you feel the anger rising, it’s best for both of you to get a 20 minute cool-down break before resuming your discussion.

Lack of intimacy is another common relational problem. With this problem, I am referring not only to sexual intimacy or physical affection but also to emotional connection. This can happen because the intensity of passion naturally subsides as the relationship gets “older.” Moreover, as disappointment, frustrations, and resentments build over the years, there is a natural tendency to create emotional space between each other. The one who gets most affected is the partner who is more emotionally needy. The other partner gets affected when the needy partner starts demanding that his or her emotional needs be met.

The lesson here is to resolve relationship problems rather than sweep them under the rug. Otherwise the problem just festers and becomes a breeding ground for more problems.

The third common problem in relationships is infidelity. This used to predominantly be a male phenomenon but these days, more and more women are presenting the problem. Again, there are many reasons for partners to be unfaithful. Sometimes, it simply is a manifestation of lust. After all, we are still part of the animal world and lust serves us the biological purpose of procreation so that our species survives and proliferates.

Infidelity could also be a substitute for getting one’s sexual and emotional needs met when the partner is unwilling or deficient. Furthermore, infidelity could be used as a form of retaliation, or to end a failing relationship.

Infidelity is best prevented by sticking to a vow of faithfulness and by a commitment to flee from temptation. This vow and commitment should be made once the relationship is formalized. Partners have to realize and constantly remember that a formal relationship curtails one's freedom to fool around and to play around.

Despite the occurrence of these problems, the good news for couples is that there is always hope and help available. If couples are unable to resolve their problems, then it is important to get relationship counselling. A neutral, objective, and empathic mediator can help couples to get over the hump of their relationship crisis. Through relationship counselling, couples work at resolving their differences with the goal of working towards a harmonious, loving, and respectful relationship.